Ten Steps to Raising A Pharisee

Is there a danger in overemphasizing a child’s moral development? One pastor certainly thought so. In a clever satire, Carey Hardy offered the following twelve-step plan for raising a Pharisee:

1. Majoring on external instead of internal issues


2. Excessive Control


3. Overreacting to failure


4. Being unforgiving and impatient


5. Elevating preference over biblical principle


6. Unnecessary separatism


7. Judging others…other families


8. Being “belligerent”— a fighter


9. Favoritism


10. No humor - No fun.


11. Building up their self-esteem


12. Lack of genuine spirituality

In conclusion he said, “Keep parenting simple—don’t make it a complicated system of rules and regulations and micro-managing. Basically—discipline when they clearly disobey…and give them a lot of love. Live life with them…and live a life before them that exemplifies joy in the Lord…and gratitude for life…and show a lot of patience and grace along the way.” (Hardy, 2005 Shepherds Conference.)

Hardy, Carey. How to Raise a Pharisee: Avoiding Legalism in the Home, An Address Given at the 2005 Shepherds Conference, Grace Community Church, Sun Valley, California. Speaker Outline Accessed November 22, 2005 online at: http://www.gracechurch.org/shepnew/
2005notes/HardyHowtoRaiseaPharisee.pdf